The weather is finally turning in the Tennessee Valley. Though I’ve been told this has been a cool summer, I haven’t noticed. Even when the temperature is in the mere 80s, the humidity makes the outdoors feel like a sauna. Perhaps the reason I’m feeling the heat so much is because I began running this year. Plus, I tend to run a high temperature, sweating even at the thought of exercise. I’m that guy with the damp pants who walks around looking like he’s missed a restroom break or two. If I was a superhero, I’d be Stainboy, leaving a sopping trail everywhere I go. So I decided to test out a new cooling technology, the Chill Its Evaporate Cooling Towel by Ergodyne.
Chill Its Like a Boss — or a Shammy
The Chill Its is like a shammy, one of those towels you dry your car with. It’s made of absorbent PVA material, the same stuff chamois cloth is made of. When you wet the Chill Its, the thing becomes chilly. I don’t know how that happens, but it works. I have one wrapped around my neck as I’m typing this. Now it’s on my head. Now it’s on my dog, who insists on being outside with me in the summer sun, panting as he is. While trying to pretend I’m athletic, I’ve used it to cover my face while attempting to perform crunches on the park gym equipment.
I won’t lie to you. The Chill Its doesn’t make me perform more crunches. The towel’s absorbent technology doesn’t prevent me from sweating, either. I’ll still leave that seat I just vacated on the bus damp, if not downright soaked. But even if it does little to prevent me from leaking water like my dog sheds fur, the towel does cool me. A happy side effect of the towel’s absorbency is that as I continue mopping up my face, the towel remains activated. I went jogging with it one day, and the towel was in no jeopardy of drying out due to my body’s endless excretion.
Chill Its Keeps You Cool While Working
I prefer to jog with a minimum of accessories, though. I think I’d like to get one of Ergodyne’s cooling bandanas.
The best utility for the towel I’ve been testing, I think, is for anyone who works in a hot environment. If you’re in construction, for example, you might be in the habit of splashing your face with cool water every couple of hours. With the Chill Its Cooling Towel, you won’t need to be near a water source. Simply load up the towel before heading to work and store it in the handy storage container that comes with it. Whenever you’re in the need to cool off, pull out the shammy and give yourself the treatment. It’s like rolling a cool beer over your forehead.
There’s not much else to it, though I’m sure you could come up with some fanciful utility if you’re imaginative. I’d wear this thing in my underpants if I thought it would help keep me from looking like a slob. Unfortunately, the towel isn’t designed for that type of thing. So I’m just going to have to continue bumming it until some scientist in a lab comes up with a pill that’ll stop the sweating. Of course, that’ll probably cause some horrible side effect from my dry parts rubbing together. I’d rather be wet. Some of us are just wetter than others.
If you’re reading this and you’re hot, I suggest trying this type of cooling technology. And let me know if you have any ideas how to reduce the sweating. If you’re a doctor and your advice is to reduce exercise, I’m all ears.