At least nine people are injured in a protest in Kabul, Afghanistan, over a cancelled plan to burn copies of the Koran in the US.


What, exactly, are the Afghan Unwashed up to?  There was a threat to burn a Koran.  The threat was eliminated.  Now there are riots over the cancelled plan.

Am I missing something here?  Perhaps there are weekly riots and they just decided to make the theme of this week’s riots Cancelled Plans to Burn Korans.

I understand heroin production went through the roof after the US did another one of its Invade the Country for No Good Reason tricks.  Maybe they’re all completely wasted, sitting around the fire, when Abdul suggests that they have a good old-fashioned riot.  Muhammed agrees but adds that there needs to be a really press-worthy theme.  Abdul gets a gleam in his eye and says, `Burning the Koran.  Not burning – just the threat of burning!’ [all cheer]

Maybe they’re self-hating muslims, jealous that they can’t burn the Koran themselves.

Not being muslim or Afghani, perhaps I am missing a religious or cultural slant on this.  Maybe they see the US as a bunch of sissies who can’t even go through with their plans.  They’re rioting because we cancelled the plan.  It would look just like the French taunting from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, only without the French, the Holy Grail, and any sense of normalcy.

“Come back here, you son of a son of a used car salesman.  Now burn that Koran or we will be forced to taunt you a second time.”

“I wave my private parts at camels.”

“If you do not do exactly as we say, I shall be forced to trip over my colleagues, causing grievous bodily injury.”

“We will demand that the UN tax your toilet paper.”

I don’t want to be thought of as a fuddy-duddy:  I enjoy a good riot as much as the next guy.  But there has to be a cutoff somewhere, preferably before people’s limbs start getting cut off and others start dying.

The real issue, after thinking about this (for the last five seconds), is that the Afghanistanis do not have the internet.  By internet, I of course mean porn.  And Faceyspaces.  If they had porn and social networking, they’d become every bit as fat and lazy as us Ugly Americans, rendering them even more incapable of rational thought (and rioting).

“Sorry I cannot come to the riot now: I have to update my profile.”