I always wanted to be reincarnated as Charlie Sheen’s penis.  No really… think of all the interesting places it’s been.

Well, maybe not his penis, but the man is sort of an idol to most other men.  Who wouldn’t want to live the life of a rock star; partying, gorgeous women, stardom, and tons of money?  And he doesn’t even seem to be a musician.  But the man lives the life.

Unfortunately all is not platinum in Charlie’s life.  My desire to be like my part-time idol has lessened after hearing of yet another seeming public incident.  Depending on who you hear it from, Mr. Sheen was out in public, in a hotel suite, frothing at the mouth, snowing at the nose, hallucinating, yelling for no apparent reason, and/or having a good time, perhaps in the vicinity of Denise Richards and their children.

Regardless of which way you hear it, this doesn’t seem a life worth emulating.  At this point, it’s barely a life of which to be jealous.  Not even close to rock star-ish.


Dude – what’s the problem?  It’s not like this is the first time.  Take it from a fan (oddly enough, a musician): you need to come to grips with whatever is eating you.  There is no shortage of help available – you just have to want to make use of it.  No one can do this for you.

Of course the ultimate karmic revenge would be for Charlie to come back as me.


One could wonder if living this kind of life naturally leads to this conclusion.  Apparently not, especially if you’re John Mayer.  Or Alex Rodriguez.  Actually it seems to have worked out quite well for Mayer.  He’s all Charlie plus a very talented singer, writer, and guitarist.  His John Thomas has been places about which we can only dream.  A number of famous females have actually written songs dissing him after being shown the door.

I’m jealous.  Again.