Someone tactfully explained to me that I cannot unfriend everyone I know if I’m not a Faceyspaces member.

Oh…

I was out shopping with my wife yesterday.  Or rather, I was being dragged around and forced to carry stuff for a few short hours yesterday.  My wife saw a pair of shoes that came in black and putty.  She hit me when I inquired if they also came in grout.

I get hit a lot.  I have no idea why.

My wife is multiply gifted, so to speak.  She goes toward the larger end of what’s available in most stores for women.  As a result, she sometimes shops in places that cater to larger women.  I have just one question for the designers at Lane Bryant:

What makes you assume that women want to look like circus clowns if they don’t fit into a size eight?  The only thing missing from the clothes you sell are the rubber nose and floppy shoes.