Growing up, I was always told that nobody likes a snitch. Mimicking a young, shaggy-headed Matt Dillon in Over the Edge, they’d say: “A kid who tells on another kid is a dead kid.” Hall monitors and crossing guards would constantly try and get me to rat out my fellows for transgressions both real and imagined. “Who pulled the fire alarm, Bobby?” and “Why is this sewer cap missing, young man?” My defiant answer was always the same: “I ain’t seen nothin’!” Then I’d have to repeat the grade because, as my grade school English teacher was fond of telling me, “ain’t ain’t in the dictionary.”
(Actually, it is. But telling her this didn’t win me any favors — unless you want to call being sent to the corner to think about the consequences of questioning or correcting authority a favor.)
Microsoft seems to be playing the part of those hall monitors and crossing guards of yore, because whenever Windows 7 breaks down, it’s always hounding me for information about “error this” and “error that” and “please tell us the nature of your problem.” First of all, I’m initially prompted to reply with “It’s not my problem, bub! It’s your problem!” But then Microsoft’s all “nuh-uh!” And I’m all, “yuh-huh!” This doesn’t really solve the problem — whether it’s my problem or Microsoft’s problem. The endless back and forth, as enlightening as it may seem on the page, really isn’t much fun. All I really want to do is disable error reporting in Windows 7. Is that so wrong?
Here’s how it goes down. When Windows 7 generates an error message, a window appears asking whether or not you want to send an error report to Microsoft. If you never send error reports, you can disable error reporting altogether.
To disable error reporting in Windows 7, click Start, type in gpedit.msc in the Search field, and press Enter.
When the Group Policy Editor appears, navigate to Computer Configuration > Administrative Templates > Systems > Internet Communication Management > Internet Communication Settings.
Double click Turn off Windows Error Reporting, click Enable, and then click OK.
Now you know how to disable error reporting in Windows 7. Take that, Microsoft! We ain’t telling you nothing. (But I’ve just been sent a scathing email from my grade school English teacher. I may just have to repeat the fourth grade. Again.)